meditation | a peace of my life

They bill it as “a family run business which offers you, as the name suggests,. the opportunity to relax, revive and restore yourself in in the most breathtaking and serene locations both the UK and abroad” so I was prepared for some much needed R&R as I packed the car up for a weekend at Brooklands, West Sussex with Chill Out Retreats. What’s more I was promised a rare weekend in the UK – a full weekend of glorious sunshine – it was obvious something special was going to happen.

Those hopes were momentarily dashed as I sat cursing in rush hour traffic only 3 miles from my destination, so achingly close and yet as the time ticked on, even closer to missing that all important welcome and first yoga class to really get you into the weekend.

This was the first time I had been on ‘retreat’ and there was a part of me that worried I would be surrounded by a bunch of hippies ‘ohming’ all weekend in hemp clothing, smelling of wee (apologies to all you proud hippies out there but that’s where I went in my head – it was a long drive!). However when I did finally arrive, a little hot, tired and stressed out I was pleasantly surprised to meet 12 normal people looking for a chance of some rest and a bit of a giggle at the same time.

The weekend began with a real treat – an open air yoga class led by the wonderful Nat who with her patient and soothing tone eased all of the tension the last 3 hour drive had built up and set the tone for the whole weekend. Nat has yoga and healing in her blood as we discovered later that day, coming from a long line of spiritual healers and yoga masters – in fact her family history is so interesting it was the subject of a BBC documentary back in the 70s. She counts spiritualists, surfing champions, inventors and award-winning academics amoungst her closest relatives – a real hotpot of creativity, intelligence and spirituality stemming from her Grandpa’s (Pa) desire to leave his comfortable life as a doctor in Harley Street in the 50s/60s and enable the family to learn more traditional healing methods and lead a more self-contained life. But this is not my story to tell so I shall get back to the yoga!

I have never practiced yoga outside but what an experience – the smell of the countryside, the sounds of the birds, the blue of the sky took me to a place I haven’t visited for the last five years – a time before children, a demanding job and a hectic life, a place I like to call my bliss! And this continued as we began our first of the weekend’s meditation practices.

Let me clarify; I have NEVER meditated and find the whole thing a little cringey so I was prepared for giggling and scepticism. Nat talked us through the first practice where we counted up to ten and back down again using our breath as a marker and trying as best as we can to clear our minds. I don’t know if it was the sunshine or the lovely surroundings but I did find myself just being in the moment and despite a little giggling as we closed the session with the optional ‘ohm’ (I am happy to say the giggles weren’t from me but they made me smile!) I thought perhaps I hadn’t given meditation credit and perhaps this wouldn’t be as ‘hippy’ as I thought. Being in the moment I may be but my stomach was definitely looking to the future and the promise of a delicious meal if the smells coming from the kitchen were anything to go by.

Before dinner was served we were free to explore the beauty of Brooklands and I unpacked in my spacious and beautifully decorated bedroom, which would be my home for the weekend. Now as I have mentioned to many of you my diet has been a little ‘strict’ recently -between trying to control the IBS, the intolerances of the family, losing weight and getting healthy there has been a lot of food ‘dumped’ and this has led to a tricky situation when it comes to eating out. However despite this I hadn’t bought any fall back food with me (not even wine and chocolate!) so I had to hope the food served met the following criteria: wheat free, dairy free, unrefined sugars, free of chemicals and additives and packed full of nutritious vegetables and fruit. Would I regret not bringing dinner with me?

Food for the weekend was under the strict control and delivery of Nat’s equally lovely sister Lucy. I could dedicate a whole blog to her food and still not do it justice but instead I will keep it to this. Not only was it delicious, filling, meeting all the criteria described above but it was cooked and presented with a smile, care, warmth and (I may be getting a little romantic here) a genuine love for food and people. I enjoyed every meal and it energised and healed me in equal measure so a wholehearted thanks to Lucy – I even enjoyed the prunes ; )

So back to the retreat. Night one was spent getting to know everyone and not surprisingly all bar one of the ‘retreaters’ were women and it was nice to hear the yoga experience from a male perspective. What I was happy to share was the number of us with young children and on night one it was clear that we were all here for the same reason – to unwind from the stress of family life, enjoy each other’s company and have a good time. That said we did dedicate a lot of the first night’s conversation to our beautiful children who we all clearly missed.

I struggled with sleep the first night for two reasons; firstly I was so excited about what tomorrow would bring, the promise of more of what we had already experienced in such a short period of time was energising rather than sleep provoking! Secondly it was so hot; the weather forecast clearly wasn’t lying when it promised a weekend of sunshine.

The morning finally came around and we started the day with a delicious super fresh smoothie and an optional, not so delicious wheat grass shot (of which I am not convinced!) Then it was straight to the yoga studio for an energising meditation and yoga class.

Meditation focussed on repeating several mantras (see separate post on meditation mantras that worked for me). The idea was to repeat these until you found your zen or whatever it was you needed to find. At first I struggled to concentrate as I was so busy trying to remember the words but soon I relaxed and by the time I got to ‘I will make progress’ I was visualising a long winding road heading towards the sea with my family walking beside me. As we walked along in silence I felt the soothing sea breeze on my face and could actually smell the ocean – I did it, I was out of the room, I was in the zone – and that’s when I dropped promptly back into the room and realised I had had it for a split second only to lose it as soon as I had realised. It may have only been a short few seconds but the feeling was exhilarating and confirmed me as a true meditation addict – I wanted to feel that again but I just couldn’t recreate it and when Nat chimed to say the practice was over I felt frustrated, but had discovered something new about myself.

An energising yoga practice then followed, followed by a yummy buffet-style breakfast with something for everyone (and thank god as I was famished!) Then it was free time (what’s that I hear you ask)!

So what to do – hire a bike, go for a swim in the private Brookland’s pool, go for a walk down by the river, explore Arundel or just sunbathe in the Mediterranean – styled courtyard. With two hours of free time before lunch the temptation to do nothing was great (particularly as I haven’t read a book from start to finish in a few months!) but I took to the pool for an enlivening swim. 30 mins later and I was laid out sunbathing and reading – good intentions and all that but the sunshine was a call too far!

Lunch was an amazing mix of salads, frittata, fruit and veggies. Then it was treatment time – something I had been looking forward to! I had chosen three treatments for the weekend. Firstly reflexology; I have never had reflexology and I plan to write a separate post on the benefits and practice (watch this space) and it was a really lovely experience. The basis of it is that your foot represents your whole body and by stimulating part of your feet you can energise and soothe your internal and external body. I thought it might just be a nice foot massage but I was wrong. As Louise (one of the therapists and a real people person with a genuine smile for everyone) rubbed and massaged my toes I felt a shiver up my neck and across my head. As she continued I forgot it was only my feet being massaged as my entire body followed what she was doing with my feet. And as an added bonus I had sweet smelling and soft tooties for the rest of the day!

My next treatment was an ‘It works’ wrap – a modern, plant-based fat wrap for those that remember the clay and cling-film type of old. Louise body brushed my stomach and placed the wrap infused with plant extracts such as chestnut and then wrapped me in the pre-requisite cling-film. I was to keep this on until the yoga class at 6pm – so 3 hours.

The ‘It works’ body wrap has been the talk of the town in Hollywood and it is now being pushed over here. At £20 – £30 an application it isn’t cheap but then again it isn’t expensive either and if it worked would be well worth the money. According to the hype the ingredients in the applicator help with skin rejuvenation, reducing swelling and lipolysis. What this means is I was promised a tighter, more toned stomach with little to no effort – in fact I spent the 3 hours flat on my back reading. It felt nice – I thought it might be hot but it was more like a cold, menthol feeling and the only side effect was a constant thirst and the need to wee! After 3 hours (it can be left on overnight but I had yoga to do!) I took it off and on close inspection yes it appeared to have toned the area and it certainly looked tighter. The measurements showed I had lost an inch on my waistline – an inch in 3 hours! – with the promise of more results in 72 hours. Whether this was down to water loss or simply sweating it out in the cling film for 3 hours only time will tell but I can see this as a perfect way to squeeze into that figure-hugging dress for that big event or just before heading out to the beach for the day for that perfect beach-bod. So all in all a big thumbs up for the ‘It works’ wrap – to buy please check out chilloutretreats.com or you can buy it on eBay or direct from the manufacturers. Google ‘It works’ and there are loads of buying options.

My final treatment wasn’t until the Sunday – but we had one more night of open air yoga to enjoy, further group meditation (sending some of us into a deep and not-so peaceful sleep!) and another delightful meal cooked by Lucy. Unlike the night before where some had stayed up into the small hours getting to know each other, everyone was ready to hit the hay early as a day of relaxation in the sunshine caught up. I was no different and was scrubbed, coconut-oiled (see previous post) and fast asleep before it even got dark! And unlike the night before sleep found me quickly and kept hold of me for a full 10 hours!! Yes 10 hours sleep – unheard of in this household!

Day three arrived rather sadly and I promised myself to make the most of it. It started much the same way swapping static meditation for walking meditation in the grounds of Brooklands. I struggled with this but enjoyed the feeling of grass beneath my feet and the sun on my back. Then came a full on Pilates class (as you know my favourite!) followed by more free time, which some of us decided to fill with a scenic tour of Arundel with our more than able tour guide Nat.

It was an intimate walk along the river and into the beautiful city of Arundel itself. After a brief stop for ice-cream (or sorbet for me) and a few sweets for the children (and big child) back home we headed off to explore the cathedral – a must see if you are ever in Arundel. I love cathedrals – their air of spirituality, their reverence to a different time and the love and respect they reflect of those that still care for them today. As I always do when visiting a cathedral I lit a candle for those that have left us (my Dad for example) and to celebrate those that have just joined us on life’s journey (my little Goob and Teddles).

We then explored Arundel’s large and magnificent parks, with sweeping vistas, plenty of sheep and an electric fence or two. It was a hot walk but we discussed everything from motherhood to spirituality and in good humour and company we walked up an appetite. It was a great compliment to the stillness of the day before as well as a chance to visit outside of the retreat for those (i.e. me) who had been too lazy to visit the beach the day before. But it felt like a closing chapter on the weekend, even more so as we headed back to Brooklands to find some of the guests already leaving.

After lunch I had my third and final treatment – Reiki. Again I would like to dedicate a whole post to this practice, particularly as I have booked another session now I am back as I found it so, well, indescribable. It felt like being in a dream state but awake, being present but not there and when I woke after half an hour I knew I had to do it again, such was the intensity of feeling and the profound sense of peace and creativity it had sparked in me – in fact it is one of the reasons for this blog!!

So that was it – over. Three of the guests (two sisters and a friend – the gigglers and a real joy to be with) had bought Nat, Lucy and Louise a leaving present of a sign that seemed to me to sum up the whole weekend if I can be just a little romantic once again. It said ‘May our guests leave as friends’ and that certainly felt true in my case – in fact I have already been back in touch and am planning my next retreat in November!! Such a great weekend is rare in today’s bustling life – a weekend to really explore yourself amongst people that won’t judge or need you for anything other than for yourself. But I want to focus on one moment that for me summed up the whole experience.

As we finished our last open aired yoga session on the Saturday night Nat read a beautiful poem about a bird souring on the breeze. As I listened, so sad that the experience would soon be over, I gazed up to see a lone bird circling above and for that split second I was that bird on the breeze and I knew it would be ok to go home and use everything I had learnt to create a peaceful space for me in my own nest surrounded by loved ones.

Thanks to everyone at Chill Out Retreats and I hope this post has done your fine work justice. For more information please visit chilloutretreats.com – until next time…..

Namaste

a peace of my life

Motherhood, diets, work, exercise – creating a space to find peace for me

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Metta Bhavana

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